Mood: BitchyHow deep is your understanding when you say you know your best friend, girl friend or boy friend.
Some people claim they are a good friend to their friend but they can't give their advice and opinions. Respectful friends will listen and hear out the pro and cons but will decide according to what they feel and think. And as a good friend or someone close to her/ him would respect what ever her/ his decision taken by her/him.
"You are attracted to me Lyenna?" I was asked..."I like you, attracted ermm... nope!""you dont have to be nice, just say it" he replied"
i just said what i feel, nothing more nor less"and the conversation continues and make me feel cornered to the point i have to tell him.
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you know what, Ive been nice to you all this while becoz i care abt people feelings but now i have to tell you this.... ""i hate being pushed and you are one of them, so with that excused given to you all this while was the answer of why i never agree to any date, appoinment or saying yes when R asked me to come for dinner with you""you want me to be blunt? There you go. I'll go or say yes to anyone i like or feel comfortable with and it depends on when and how my moods are" They dont have to be handsome or pretty to be with me, they can enjoy all night long sharing tales and story if i feel i want to grant my precious time. But since you want me to follow and suit you i guess i have problems with that. Not just you! Its anyone.
I have my own priority and its my prerogative on how i should manage it. I know i've been running away. I dont mind making friends but i mind when that friends have something beyond. Im sorry i cant entertain that.
Relationship put me in a lots of difficulties and emotional swing. I just want the shortcuts or the highway which is long but smooth, meaning be friend but not emotion bondage. Scared, yes i am. Fall? Yes, i can easily because of my vulnerability. Hence, i avoid being in one. I just want what i want now. Nothing more, nothing less.
I am in a middle of something. I would just give myself few more months and then ill decide which path suits me best...
I know i want something to hold on but if that person cant open the umbrella wide then i cant force anything into his nor mine. I let the flow brings me where i should be. I wont be stressing myself again to hurt me. No more!
I just enjoy the attention, enjoy they pampering me, enjoy them being around me, but please dont come near, ill fly again like a bird. Once i get myself bored at certain place i'll fly again further or back to the same place i 've been. I like it, I stay longer, I dont, i'll move on again.
What stays?? Treasure of a friendship, you can be there for it then be there. You can't, you have a choice. Dont waste it. Yes life is short. I do it my way...
